2nd Trimester, baby!

I've been so excited to have finally reached the end of my 1st trimester.  Unfortunately, it doesn't mean my energy comes back & the nausea disappears immediately.  If this pregnancy goes like the one with Shaylin, then I've still got a couple more weeks to go.

But still, just reaching the point of the pregnancy when the risk of miscarriages takes a nose dive makes me happy.  And a good doctor's appointment this past week where we again heard the baby's heartbeat brings me a big sigh of relief.

The nausea is still pretty random.  I have good days & bad days.  Eating & I have a love/hate relationship now.  All along I could eat & my nausea would go away.  And it's still like that.  But now eating makes me sick.  Sometimes I even go into a meal not sick but then about 10 minutes after I eat I'm sick.  I'm trying to watch my portions but that hasn't seemed to make a difference.  Hopefully this doesn't continue through the remainder of the pregnancy.  There's too much good food out there!

Last week I had some really bad headaches, the kind that wouldn't go away.  And of course Tylenol, the only thing I'm allowed to take, doesn't work as well as other options out there.  Someone brought up the possibility of not drinking enough water so I started chugging water & since then I haven't had anymore headaches.  It's possible it could just be hormone-related, especially since the headaches occurred at the end of the 1st trimester.  But I know I haven't been drinking near the amount of water I used to so increasing it certainly isn't a bad thing.

Ending my 1st trimester also meant that I was able to stop taking prometrium, the progesterone supplement I've been taking twice a day since I learned I was pregnant.  I'm so happy to have 2 less pills to swallow everyday!  They weren't big pills but when you're feeling sick any pill is a struggle to get down.

My next checkup is on the 26th.  I'll be 17 1/2 weeks at that point so I'm hoping I will get to schedule my BIG ultrasound while I'm there.  I think my doctor prefers his patients to be 18 or 19 weeks before having it done so probably somewhere around the 1st week of November we'll get to know who's in there!  I can't wait!

Where Were You?

I heard this song this morning.  It will probably get played a lot over the weekend.

And so I ask . . . where were you?  Where were you on September 11, 2001 when you heard about the attack on our country?  How did you react?

I was a senior at Bob Jones University.  At 9:00, which was just after the first plane hit, I started Spanish class.  I remember about halfway through the class that one student's cell phone rang.  The teacher was annoyed since phones were supposed to be turned off during class & he quickly silenced the call.  When class got out I remember seeing him in the hall on his phone, likely returning his missed call.  Later that day I found out that his mom was the one calling him, telling him about the attacks. 

Keep in mind of where I was at the time.  There were very few TV's on campus.  So news of the "outside world" didn't come instantly.  This was also before the days of smartphones.

So after Spanish class I went to the next room which was the "Language Lab".  Basically you had to spend so much time in there each week doing language exercises, listening to tapes to improve your speaking abilities in the language you were learning.  I think I spent about 30 minutes in there. 

We had chapel Mondays through Thursdays at 11:00.  Since I had some time to spare I decided to walk to the library to check my email.  There weren't a whole lot of people in there but I didn't think much of it since it was during a class hour.  Checked my email but there was nothing about the attacks.  I probably could have gotten on some sort of news website but I didn't.  I was probably there about 15 minutes so I started heading to the FMA (Founder's Memorial Amphitheater) for chapel.  I remember the campus seeming empty.  Not a lot of people out.  Again, I thought it was weird but didn't put much more thought into it.

Once I got in the FMA I met up with 2 friends.  And they asked me if I heard about the terrorist attacks.  What?!  They said some planes had flown into the World Trade Center.  I also remember one friend being a little nervous because she felt these terrorist would want to do harm to Christians & a place like BJU, especially in a general assembly like chapel, would be their perfect target. 

Chapel wasn't like others before.  Dr. Bob updated the student body on what was known at the time, which wasn't much.  It had only been a little over 2 hours since the first plane hit.  They weren't even sure yet who the attack was from.  I remember him also saying that there could be as many as 10,000 people killed in this attack, considering it was in New York City & how many people usually are in those buildings.  That just blew my mind.

He chose for the school day to go on as usual.  Classes would continue as normal.  To this day I still have mixed feelings on this decision.  Yes, there was no good in just sitting & worrying.  But there were students from New York or Washington, DC that were scared for their loved ones.  I had one friend who was scared because her dad worked at the Pentagon & she couldn't get a hold of anyone in her family.  She finally got to talk to someone later & was relieved to hear her dad was ok.  But I felt bad that she had to try to focus on class while worried about her dad.  It didn't seem fair.

That day I was having lunch with a friend.  He had a class at noon so I had to wait for him to get out.  So I went to the bottom of one of the girls' dorms where a TV was so I could watch the news & see this for myself.  Seeing that 2nd plane hit the other tower just didn't seem real.  It was something you only saw in movies.

That night President Bush spoke to the nation & we were able to see it as another general assembly.  There were a lot of tears.  A couple of my friends had actually been inside the World Trade Center just that summer so to see those towers crumble to the ground was hard to watch.

Patriotism was amazing after that day.  I think there was an American flag in every dorm window.  My roommates & I even bought some red, white, & blue lights & strung them around our window.

So that's my story.  I've seen one of those reposting status' that says how I couldn't tell you what I did last Tuesday, but I could tell you what I did on that Tuesday 10 years ago.  That couldn't be more true!

Again I ask, where were you?

I get to do what?!

This past Monday I had my monthly OB checkup.  We were able to hear the heartbeat on the doppler, which was a big surprise to me since I didn't think it would have been possible for another week.  We also discuss my insomnia issues.  My doctor agreed that exercise could help to help wear me out (as if I'm not worn out already).  But he decided to prescribe Ambien so I could have a better guarantee of sleep.  So far I've only used it 3 different nights & it's definitely helped.  I still wake up once each night for a bathroom visit but that's to be expected.  At least now it's not taking me up to 2 hours to fall asleep.

While discussing my exercise routine, which has hardly been "routine", he suggested that I pick up the pace on walking just a bit.  I had been doing a slow 20 min. pace, mostly because I wasn't sure what I could handle.  I mentioned that in reality I don't enjoy walking since it just makes me want to run.  His response:  "Then run."

What?!  Me?  You remember who you're talking to, right?

He suggested that I just slow my pace down a bit so it's not too much impact but said I'd be just fine since I've already been a runner.  There just won't be any marathon-type runs.

So on Wednesday I decided to give it a try.  I even put on the singlet I used to wear for a lot of my long runs.  It just to hang really big on me.  I prefer my singlets loose.  Well, it's not loose anymore.  I couldn't believe how much I had filled it out already!

Since it had been over a month since my last run (a final pre-pregnancy run that I was very happy with) I decided to run as if I was just starting out.  I would walk for 2 min. & then run (well, really it was a jog) for 2 min. & continued this for 30 min.  The running times were weirdly tiring considering it was so much slower than I used to be, but it didn't completely exhaust me.  And each time I ran I loved it.  I wasn't starring at the clock waiting for the 2 min. to be up.  Really, I probably could have gone longer but I want to be careful.  The only difficulty I had was with my knees.  They felt as if I had been running for 15 miles.  And that night the rest of my joints from the waist down ached so bad.

Being given permission to run is huge for me.  Even though I had a complication-free pregnancy with Shaylin & she was completely healthy, I will always be considered high-risk.  But now to be allowed to still do something like running makes me feel almost "normal".  I don't have to just live in a bubble & be afraid to do anything.

So far I've only run that one time.  My joints just hurt that bad.  I would have run today but was just too full from lunch so I simply walked.  Hopefully I can get into a better routine & keep this up.  Then I'll have to find out just how far into the pregnancy I can continue running.  It would just be hilarious to run while 8 months pregnant!  I'll just have to find some way to hold my giant belly!

Insomnia

One of my early pregnancy symptoms is insomnia.  I don't know what it is but when I'm pregnant something just prevents me from sleeping.  And it's not even nausea, although lately that's been keeping me up some nights.

I've tried Unisom but only half the dosage.  It would make me sleepy but then once I lay my head on my pillow I'd be wide awake.

I called my doctor's office to see if Unisom was ok or if they had another suggestion.  The nurse practitioner suggested Benadryl.  Well, that had pretty much the same affect.

And then I've tried Tylenol PM, but only on nights that I have a headache.  That's been the best but sometimes even after taking that I'd still toss & turn for 2 hours!

Part of my problem is I get too hot really easily.  Something else to blame on hormones!  What's weird is it's really just my legs that get hot.  And then they get restless which leaves me tossing & turning.  So some nights I've had to take the comforter off my side of the bed & just use a quilt.  That seems to help keep me from getting too hot.

I also wake up a lot at night.  It doesn't take much.  Lots of bathroom breaks which is normal of course.  And sometimes that leaves me wide awake.  Or I wake up to Jeremy's alarm & try to go back to sleep but I'm too awake.  That's what happened today.

Naps have been terrible.  I have tried to take a nap just about every single day since I found out I was pregnant but all I do is lay there wide awake.  Or Shaylin wakes up crying through the 2-3 hours so even if I did fall asleep it wouldn't be for long.  For some reason she's really been struggling with naps in the last month.

Hopefully once this trimester is over the insomnia will pass & I will start to sleep better again.  Of course, then the 3rd trimester will soon come along & then I'll be so big & uncomfortable & won't be sleeping well again.  I guess it's all in preparation for the new baby & getting my body used to living on very little sleep.

Pregnancy Update

I decided to wait until after today's doctor's appointment before giving a pregnancy update.  I haven't been overly worried but still nervous from time to time. 

We had a 2nd sonogram today.  The one from 2 weeks ago was very early so we didn't see the baby.  I knew we wouldn't but that was still hard.  But today almost right away we saw a "mass" that was our baby.  At this point the baby's arms & legs are beginning to form.  That's hard to see on a sonogram though, so it looks like a big mass.  But we could still see where the head is & see arm buds on the side & best of all, saw a tiny heartbeat.  And we heard it!  As much as just seeing the baby gave me a sigh of relief, hearing the heartbeat sent me to tears.  It's just beautiful!  The only thing more beautiful will be his/her first cry.

So why was I so nervous about this sonogram despite the nausea I've had for over a week now?  It just still seems surreal to me.  For so long I felt like I was just the woman who had miscarriages.  Then I had a baby.  So in some strange way I still feel like I'm "supposed" to have more miscarriages before I can have another baby.

Another strange thing that went through my head was fear that this pregnancy would end like my 1st one did.  With that one I had a sonogram at 5 1/2 weeks & we saw nothing but thought it was too early.  A week later we still saw nothing & knew we lost the baby.  So somehow in my warped thinking I feared that this would be like my 1st pregnancy, like we were starting all over again.  Granted, I didn't have near the kind of symptoms then that I have now. 

Now I just feel so blessed.  Nauseous, too.  But most of all blessed.  It was a long, hard road to have a baby.  And as much as we wanted more babies, we knew that if Shaylin was all God chose to give us that would still be more than we once thought we'd get.  So now to be 8 months away from having a 2nd baby, it's just overwhelming.

Yes, it IS hot enough for me!

I'm so glad I don't work anymore.  I'm sure if I did I would still have customers walk into my office & ask "Is it hot enough for ya?".  What does that even mean?! 

Lately it's actually been too hot for me & everybody else.  Today will be day 34 of continuous days of 100+ temps.  The record was set in 1980 with 42 days.  And based on the forecast we will likely set a new record in 2011.  May as well if we're going to endure this heat, although it's not like we'll win a prize for it.

I heard that we reached 111 degrees in some areas yesterday.  And according to weather.com it's predicting 110 for today through Saturday.  Just now at 7:30am it's already 85 degrees!

The heat has really been affecting me lately.  I've been feeling a little sick when I get too hot.  And sometimes there's just no avoiding it.  It really makes me feel for those pregnant ladies around here who are in the last weeks or days of their pregnancies.  I can't even imagine how miserable they must feel!  I pray they can get some relief soon, either with a cold front or by going into labor & getting to sleep in one of those extra cold hospital rooms.

I'm also praying for the people that have to work outside in this.  In the first couple years of our marriage Jeremy was one of those people.  He read meters for the electric company so there was lots of walking no matter the weather.  If our meter hadn't already been read I would be looking out for our meter reader so I could offer him some iced water.  A few people did that for Jeremy when he was out there & I really appreciated it.  We do have a mailman that walks the neighborhood so my plan today is to place a note inside our mailbox letting him know that the cooler on the steps has water & Gatorade in it & it's for him.  Hopefully he will take it & that won't see creepy.  I just know it's hard enough walking this neighborhood because of the hills, let alone in 100+ heat!

I'm also tired of being cooped up in the house.  And Shaylin is too.  She so wants to play outside but there just isn't a good time to do it.  As soon as it cools down, even to the low 100's, I'm going to have to take her to the splash pad so she can have some outdoor water fun.

Then there is my dogs.  Kaylee in particular loves being outside.  It's just the type of breed she is.  Keira gets excited to go out but is always more excited to come back inside.  And that may be because the heat is making her sick.  So I have to be careful on how long I let them stay outside.  Plus, these poor dogs haven't been on a walk in months.  It's just too hot for us all to go out.

Hopefully all of this misery will end in another month of so.  But that's a long way away.  August tends to be the hottest month in Texas & it's only the 4th.

Back to Reality

Yesterday was our first OB visit & we all went as a family.  Shaylin was absolutely precious, especially for waking up extra early.  She sweetly sat in her daddy's lap while I was being examined but once I could hold her she wanted me.

They had gotten my 2nd beta & progesterone counts back.  The first was 1,267 for the hcg level & 16.7 for the progesterone.  Both good numbers so we were pretty excited on Friday.  Well, my 2nd beta count was 2,017 & it got me worried.  It wasn't a full double like I was expecting.  I was expecting something over 2,500.  But my doctor assured me that it was good.  My progesterone was up to 34.something, which is thanks to the extra daily dose.

They drew lots of blood, checking stuff like my iron level & a whole bunch of other stuff.  The nurse missed the first time & hit a nerve.  Holy cow!  That hurt!  She got it the 2nd try in the other arm though.  I have very tiny veins so I try to be forgiving because I know I'm not an easy one.

Then we had a sonogram.  I wasn't sure if they were going to bother since at 5 weeks you really don't see much.  But I told them I'd feel better having one & I'll fight my insurance company if they raise stink about it.  With my history of miscarriage I'm sure it would be approved.

And just as I expected we didn't see much on the sonogram.  We saw the gestational sac, which is where the baby is.  And we saw the yolk sac, which will slowly shrink as the baby grows.  But being so early that's all we saw.  I was disappointed but not surprised.  Based on the measurements it actually has my due date moved back to April 3, instead of March 31st.  But this doesn't worry me because I know I ovulated 2 or 3 days later than "normal".  I always have.  So that means the baby is right on track!

Despite a good report, I still got worried.  A lot of it is just being back there again.  Even after all the good visits during my pregnancy with Shaylin, I still have this fear walking in that office.  And I feel bad because I LOVE my doctor.  But he's very understanding & even acknowledged that I will always have fears because of my history.  So it's nice to know he doesn't think I'm crazy.

I guess I just had a hard time being reminded of my reality, that I have a long history of miscarriages & that despite a completely normal & healthy pregnancy with Shaylin, the odds are still against me.  What also got me yesterday was during the nurses questions when we first got there she asked (for clarification) if this was my 8th pregnancy.  I cannot describe to you what that feeling is when I'm reminded of that.  So I'm not going to try.

Later I talked to my mom & she said from reading she did that your hcg levels actually have up to 72 hours to double.  That sounded familiar but it had been a long time since I'd read up on that.  So I searched around & confirmed what she said.  So as close as mine was it certainly would have doubled by 72 hours.  So that made me feel better.  And I just had to keep reminding myself that the sonogram, although it doesn't show a baby, shows that things are progressing as they should so far.

We go back on the 16th for another sonogram.  I will be 7 weeks at that point so we should definitely see more by then.  And then 2 weeks later we go back for our 2nd OB visit.  If he wants to do another sonogram then, I'm so ok with that!

The whole visit just reminded me that we have a long road ahead of us.  Everyday that goes by is a celebration.  But everyday I will be asking God for strength to get through it.